Goal or Distraction

When the goal is the distraction, actually

How are we to navigate the fine line between what we yearn for and what our evolution requires, what we think we want and what we actually need, who we want to be and who we are?

Fixation on someone, something often masquerades as goal setting. We want something. We work our whole circumstance to obtain the someone, something. It starts to consume our thoughts, our time, our energy. It starts to steal energy from our families, our friends, our work. What often happens in laukika, or worldly, life is that goals choose us rather then we choosing them. Therein lies the problem. The man. The woman. The perfect body or even body part. The getting our child to do or not do this or that. The sneakers. An ideal weight. The vacation itinerary. The dating website. The Porsche. The frozen-in-time plump skin. The video game, the social media platform, the online store.

Some may argue the above are noble goals. Yoga would differentiate based on each individual and their parameters, but particularly that compulsion happens based on our guna-s and klesa-s, where although we think we are in control, something under the surface is deciding for us.

Let’s say I’m in an ongoing, unhappy marriage or partnership. And I’m determined, even though I’m miserable, to stay there. Not to do the work together (perhaps on my part, or his, or both), but to endure, in an ongoing sabotage of my confidence and health. Whether for love, for financial reasons, sexual gratification, practical reasons or for supposed not wanting to damage my child/children, or a combination thereof, even though it’s not working, I’m staying. Rather than a goal, this serves as distraction from my evolution and liberation, as my authentic self is crying for freedom. That tends to be the tell-tale sign.

This is tamo guna taking over. It’s a habitual heaviness that accumulates and keeps me in circumstances that are not healthy for me, like jobs or relationships. The psycho-behavioral-emotional loop has me locked into complacency despite my ongoing suffering.

This is avidya taking over, an underlying idea of permanency in something that would be better framed as having served a purpose. This is fear, literally freezing me in an unfavorable situation.

This is asmita taking over, as perhaps my whole identity is based on the maintenance of this job, my reputation as so-an-so’s wife, financially stable and comfortably housed. Our identities hold tremendous weight in our goal-orientation. Often maintaining identity is why we choose goals; however, Yoga suggests releasing the attachment we have to our accumulated identities, so we can find ourselves.

Raja guna is always nesting in there as well, perhaps lashing out at work in gossip to vent anger, frustration and resentment. Perhaps micro or macro cheating taking over with other men I find attractive and am sucking into my mess.

As Yoga Therapists, we are pro-goal and we set goals from our first encounter, both long term and short term. Patanjali's health system calls this hanam, our liberation from our suffering. Knowing our student population, we have set a number of goals in the upcoming month. Align with them? Register for our classes to set healthy goals, abolish distractions and take the edge of summer's finale.